THE FORTY-SIX YEAR OLD VIRGIN

I never married and I never produced children. However, if I had the chance to marry, I would treat her with respect and dignity. And I could've been a great parent, but there's no way to know for certain because I'm a forty-six year old virgin. I've been a bachelor for the past forty-six years. That much is indisputable. Anything contrary to such an indisputable fact is either false or set in an alternate reality. And for every negative alternate reality accusation, there are double that number of positive alternate reality comparisons that would exonerate me. Yeah, I could debate the politics of alternate realities for hours and hours. However, none of that changes the fact that I still never married and I still never produced children. And yeah, I would love to marry and produce children, but I guess this month isn't going to be the month to get started with that.
And as I'm lost in thought while looking out of the window, here are some photos of Taylor Swift and Jaime King.